NO DOUBT ABOUT IT— DOUBT RETURNS...

I.

It moves me deeply how our hungers match,
That when I burn, you feel some heat as well,
That we meet head to head, and fan the flame,
But break our fast with food and slow delights.
I smile to hear you softly turn the latch,
A smile that says the world can go to hell.
I’m ready, and I know you feel the same—
We sit and fill the pipe and dim the lights.
At some point there is bound to be some catch—
Where there is flame, there’s also smoke and smell—
What pleasure, though, to hear you call my name,
A pleasure that survives our sordid rites.
This hour is all. All flame to ash will fall—
Until it does, I thrill to hear you call.


II.

My love, some shadow steps between us now—
A rude awakening from my dreaming state:
My love makes common cause with what I hate.
Now doubt arises, and I don’t know how
To make my peace with this unsought surprise.
Yes, we have always known me met across
A gulf of difference, met at no small cost,
But this seems different, and the difference lies
So deep I quail. A new gulf now appears,
Not past but present, and a true abyss.
I fear I do not have the strength for this—
Again I stand alone, amid my fears.
But let us not concede to noise and night,
But wait for day and hope we walk in light.
C