LATE NIGHT CHECK-IN...
Oh, what a week.
I took two days off from work to go get more than 24 hours in a row with the Goat, and really thought that I had died and gone to heaven. Transgressed a couple of his unwritten laws (tail-gated him on a dirt road, for instance) but also shared a couple of his non-bedroom hobbies and I got the distinct feeling that BOTH of us had enjoyed ourselves. Dear God, let me be right this time...
I did find myself saying that while I had no expectations of him now, if things were ever to become more definite, he needed to know that near-absolute honesty was a near-absolute value to me. [THAT was a mistake. I know. No need to post any comments on THAT.] But he is now after me to change my work schedule again to accommodate a road trip, and fool that I am, I am pretty desperate to do so. So it can't have been too bad, right?
right?
WHAT my boss will say is a Great Mystery -- things have been pretty flexible till now -- but I am already taking all of August off for other reasons and to go other places. So I may be approaching the weight of that last straw that did the camel's back...at least the new free-lance work hasn't gotten a final go-ahead, so I don't have any other immediate deadlines... but I will soon.
Visit with Beloved Daughter involved her making some choices that left a pretty bad taste in my mouth -- hey, I offered! -- she arranged visits to cousins that left me driving every day she was here, and pretty much beyond my limit. One last day in the car to get her back to her mother, and then I can wring my hands about not having taken all the joy there was to be had in the visit. I mean, I have been delighted to have her here, but so little went according to plan that I spent most of it saying, "OH. Oh, OK, I guess so," and trying to be the Flexible One.
Not my most convincing role, I 'm afraid.
I'm better at the Repentant Bastard.
I got to play that one, later on.
I hope it made up for my poor performance in the first role...
Hang in there, all.
Blessings are where you find them.
.
I took two days off from work to go get more than 24 hours in a row with the Goat, and really thought that I had died and gone to heaven. Transgressed a couple of his unwritten laws (tail-gated him on a dirt road, for instance) but also shared a couple of his non-bedroom hobbies and I got the distinct feeling that BOTH of us had enjoyed ourselves. Dear God, let me be right this time...
I did find myself saying that while I had no expectations of him now, if things were ever to become more definite, he needed to know that near-absolute honesty was a near-absolute value to me. [THAT was a mistake. I know. No need to post any comments on THAT.] But he is now after me to change my work schedule again to accommodate a road trip, and fool that I am, I am pretty desperate to do so. So it can't have been too bad, right?
right?
WHAT my boss will say is a Great Mystery -- things have been pretty flexible till now -- but I am already taking all of August off for other reasons and to go other places. So I may be approaching the weight of that last straw that did the camel's back...at least the new free-lance work hasn't gotten a final go-ahead, so I don't have any other immediate deadlines... but I will soon.
Visit with Beloved Daughter involved her making some choices that left a pretty bad taste in my mouth -- hey, I offered! -- she arranged visits to cousins that left me driving every day she was here, and pretty much beyond my limit. One last day in the car to get her back to her mother, and then I can wring my hands about not having taken all the joy there was to be had in the visit. I mean, I have been delighted to have her here, but so little went according to plan that I spent most of it saying, "OH. Oh, OK, I guess so," and trying to be the Flexible One.Not my most convincing role, I 'm afraid.
I'm better at the Repentant Bastard.
I got to play that one, later on.
I hope it made up for my poor performance in the first role...
Hang in there, all.
Blessings are where you find them.
.
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