Thursday, April 19, 2007


Not that I would want to admit it too openly, but it did occur to me recently that almost exactly a year ago I was counting the days until my wife came home, and now, here I am counting the days until the Goat Man deigns to show up on my doorstep [and that assumes that he will show up on my doorstep...].

Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose, as our cheese-eating surrender-monkey friends say. It's a little embarrassing, actually, not because of the change of scenery or the change of cast, but because of the lack of any change in the score: I mean, here I am again, hanging on some other human to make everything all right. Where is self-reliance? Where is self-respect? Well, it all takes a back seat to the need to love and be loved, I'm afraid. I guess I prefer to be as predictable as ever to being entirely self-sufficient. On some level I prefer to need other people.

People who need people...

It would just be nice if I could get my own act together in the meantime.
I am sure I am a psychologist's dream case study:
the man without a self...

Will the
Troll ever grow up? Will he ever realize that he has to be centered in some idea of his own life and its purpose before he can be worth much to anyone else? Stay tuned. You know the old chestnut [damn those Greeks!] about the unexamined life not being worth living? I would like to add that the unlived life is not worth examining. So, you ask, will you stop blogging and leave the world in peace? What, and stop amusing the five people who actually read what I post? Leave show business? Not bloody likely.

@#$% 'em if they can't take a joke.

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