Friday, July 31, 2009


One more proof that geometry does indeed have some kind of real-world reflection: parallel lives? parallel lines? Well, in any case, though Bigg and I have never even tried to meet, we just keep walking along side-by-side... which is a long, round-about way of saying that I am finding, yet again, that everything he posts [click here] seems to have been written about me. First there's this:
I have less than nothing to say. It's hot for the first time all summer. Everyone around me groans about how cold and rainy it's been and mutters darkly about global warming. I LOVE it. I am happiest hiding in the dark like a slug under a flat rock, so this entire cool rainy summer has been marvelous to me. The minute it went over eighty degrees I started to suffer...

I was sitting with my guy just watching some random show we downloaded...
when I looked over at him and was struck by how beautiful his profile is, how very well drawn his features are... And I felt this huge surge of love for him that frightened me.
That's funny enough. But then there's this, and frankly it begins to creep me out a bit. OK, so we both have a narrow range between unbearable cold and unbearable heat where we can bear anything at all. OK, so we both are batty about guys though we can't quite understand how we wound up with them. I can live with that, but then there's this:
I've come to see that the world is just like that: we're happiest when we accept that we're just broken, fallible creatures who are only here for a little while, and that's the only basis you can accept someone on if you don't want to get hurt by your expectations. My children are less than perfect, my friends are less than perfect, I even fall short of perfection although of course by a smaller degree than the rest of you grubby mortals.
This has been on my mind for a long time, as some of you will know. Though maybe there is a difference there: Bigg goes on to declare his lover the perfect one, and I still think, much as I am drowning in gratitude for the Goat in my life, that he's no closer to it than I am. Maybe it's because the Goat isn't the same age as my children... who knows???

Actually, it's cold this morning even for my understanding of the proper balance of nature. And it's been raining forever--we had over two inches the other day, and I could feel every millimeter of it drumming down on our heads (we sleep right under the roof, out in the Big Woods.) On the other hand, today is my last day of work before we take off for the West Coast, so I am happy as a clam and not particularly focused on the things I should be wrapping up before I go. That Friday afternoon feeling, starting at 7 in the morning.

Hang in there, guys.
It's cold outside.

1 comment:

  1. I'm sure that my partner's perfect - at least perfect for me.
    All my best to you, Troll. I think of you more often than you know.