Sunday, December 02, 2007


Not that it makes a lot of difference, but our nine days on the West Coast seem to have brought about a shift in the balance of power between the Goat and myself. All of a sudden, he seems to be the one who clings, and I seem to be the cooler one. After a night of fabulous recreation, I found myself looking at him clinically rather than with the eye of love, if not for the first time, then for the first time in quite a while... That was a shocker...

Not that that shakes my certainty that this is it for me, for now. Or my determination to move to the Big Woods as soon as I can get the storage shed built at my Mom's for all my junk, come spring. In fact, if anything, seeing his vulnerability for the first time since I sensed it so powerfully at our first "coming together," has bound me closer to him.

I think I am about to pass on the offer of a house at a pretty low price in the Big Woods... just a leetle too far away from the school where the Goat is essentially held hostage most of the year. Probably the last time anything this cheap will come my way, but the rooms I think I am going to rent are really fine for me, lying as they do at the foot of the hill the school is perched on... and the price is certainly right.

It's all quite a mystery.

Talk about waiting in silence and hope for whatever G*D will send next.
Here's to Advent.

Hang in there, all.

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