Friday, September 21, 2007

READER TORTURE...


So, which is worse:

last spring's overdose of Jesus, or this summer and fall's overabundance of bad poetry?

It seems a close call, somehow... In any case, the declining visitor numbers are beginning to look particularly sensible these days. You get, if you don't mind my grasping at metaphor here, what you pay for...


For reasons too stupid to go into here, I recently went cruising through old posts and found to my amazement not only that I repeat myself -- no news there -- but that I repeat myself on a rather short cycle. And now that there is little seismic shifting going on, even I can see that this is a problem.

So, like so many of my elder BlogBrothers, I am now faced with the question:

Why continue?

The obverse [?] question is obviously [at least if I have the right adjective it's obvious] "Why not continue?" and the answer is also obvious: this thing eats up way too much time, even when all I do, ahem, is post poetry I am writing anyway and the weekly horoscopes for the star-crossed lovers I'm concerned with. In the long term, there are issues that I would indeed like to return to, one of them being the whole "Jesus" thing, so consider yourself warned.

And which is worse, anyway:

the "Jesus" thing, or the "gay" thing?

They both tend to travel in circles around here, but maybe that's because everything does. [Flipster: remember the tail-chasing phenomenon? That was me!] In a way, I have painted myself into a corner here by moving from philosophical questions to my obsession with a
particular farm animal. I can't post the things that are actually going on or how I feel about much of it for the same reason that I tried [however I may have failed] not to include Isis in the tortured goings-on of last spring and summer.


But, since this is functioning as a kind of diary, I do try to include enough code so that I can in fact at some later point reproduce some sense of sequence as to what happened when -- the theory being that some day I will want to be able to remember what actually happened and not what I have since decided to make my peace with. Once you reach my age, that becomes a pretty hot topic. And now that this little public outing machine covers the two significant relationships I have had in my life, and the transition between them, it seems clear to me that remembering would not be a bad thing.

Sometimes it is, but not here. Not now.
So hang in there, all.
There is life after fifty.
I'm here to prove it.

Your
Coming-out Poster Boy for 2006


1 comment:

  1. Troll, first and foremost, you write for yourself. We who lurk do care about you, and enjoy hearing your tales of the Big Woods.

    As the many bloggers come and go, I'm always thankful that they were part of my life.

    We may even met in person someday.

    Or at least continue things off-blog.

    ReplyDelete