SELF-LOATHING LIBERATION!

[AP Wire Story] Gay liberation reached its logical, if lunatic, outer edge this morning, as Sub-comandante Maricos, wearing his trademark ski-mask and home-made palm-leaf baseball cap, took the podium in this small New England town to announce the establishment of the North American Free Traits Zone and Self-Loathing Liberation Front. The NAFTZ&SLLF combines activists from the former Dykes Without a Shred of Dignity, Faggots in Fear, and Bears for Belief Systems, representatives of many local extremist groups, as well as a few people who just like to appear in ski masks after the ski season is over. Phyllis Schafly sent a warm message of support, but was unfortunately unable to attend. A buffet dessert reception followed, and a good time was had by all. Local press coverage was minimal.

What is it about April anyway? The 1st seems to run about 4 days long...